The Best Birthday Ever

Birthday Party - Seven Years Old
Originally uploaded by kristinafh

As a parent, you always hope that your child is filled with great memories of their childhood. I'm sure that my mom, who became a parent at the ripe old age of 17 years and 3 months, had that in mind when she threw me a birthday party in our dinky, 800 square foot home on Cedar Crest Circle.

To the right is the only picture I have of that day. My three best friends from first grade were there (counter clockwise) Ericka Couch, Lisa Smith, and Beth Fruechtenicht. There's a board game sitting in front of us...but I couldn't tell you what it was and without this picture, I wouldn't even have remembered that I had The Flintstones for birthday hats and blowers. I couldn't tell you what was on my cake - if I had one number candle or seven.

What I do remember - as though it was yesterday - is that I was a very happy girl. I don't know if you can see that from my face, but gosh, I was happy.

And why was I happy? Two specific reasons - the guests and the best birthday present that I've ever received in my entire life.

The guests were my three best friends from Indian Village Elementary school and also, members of my family (aunts, uncles, cousins + my mom's cousins and their kids). All of us, squeezed together in that small amount of space sounds claustrophobic, doesn't it?! At the time, it didn't seem anything but fun. I'm sure that my mom, though, was frantic and worried because later on (much later on as an adult), she told me that she ran out of cake and food because so many people showed up that she wasn't expecting.

I probably received a fair number of birthday gifts that year but you know what - that's a blur to me. The only gift that really mattered is what my parents got me.

For the big event, I was shuttled out on to the front porch area (this area wasn't a "porch" per se as much as it was an enclosed part of our house - like a mudroom - with no heat). I was instructed to face the outdoor window and no peeking!!! That window had a view to my neighbors houses across the street - the Wooden's and the Boice's.

I remember the crowd of people who were all standing behind me, waiting for the revelation of the big moment. And then my mom said, You can turn around now.

My smile was the biggest smile you can ever imagine and I squealed with delight. It was everything I ever wanted - a big girl bike. It was a lime green bike...equipped with a white flowered basket, multi-colored plastic streamers hanging out of the handle bars, and a banana seat.

That bike stayed with me for most of my childhood. If it would have had an odometer on it, it would have had thousands of miles racked up on it because as a kid living on Cedar Crest Circle - that's what we did. We rode our bikes. We didn't have to have a destination...we just rode them. Sometimes we rode them by ourselves (in a circle - Cedar Crest, Pinecrest, Cedar Crest) and sometimes we rode in a pack....taking the same route, perhaps stopping at Scott''s Court to play a game of kickball, or sneaking off to play in the forbidden ditch (catching tadpoles), or making our way up Sandhill to play in the area that would later take the life of our friend Delores.

There was a third reason why this was the best birthday ever. It was the last birthday I remember where I wasn't conscious of my father's drinking issues. At my party, I didn't remember that he wasn't there until just before the unveiling of my bike. I didn't remember that he was drunk off his ass and he brought people to my party that I didn't even know.

And why didn't I remember these things? Because my mom made sure that I was distracted so as not to notice. She wanted my birthday to be the kind of birthday that all little girls deserve to have....one filled with lots of happy memories. It worked.

Mommy, it was the best birthday ever and as long as I live, I will never forget how special I felt that day.

Beth...the Beginning

Birthday Party - Seven Years Old
Originally uploaded by kristinafh

As I've stated previously, I don't have many photos from my childhood because most went up in flames when our house was struck by lightning (and subsequently, burnt to the ground). I mention this specifically, for this particular post, because it pains me not to have any other picture of me and Beth together. This is the one - one snapped at my seventh birthday party.

Pictured (from left): Me, Ericka Couch, Lisa Smith, Beth Fruechtenicht

But back to the beginning...

I don't remember the exact moment that I met Beth. This feels strange to me because my memory during this time is pretty vivid and detailed. Our first encounter though, had to be in Kindergarten - Miss Crouse's pm class at Indian Village Elementary School.

Beth was everything I was not - blond, perfectly proportioned, well-off, and she had the ideal parents. Her mom Sharon - I'm not sure what she did (I assumed she did something for a living) - was possibly, the nicest woman I have ever met in my entire life time. Her dad Tom - was a very important man. A state representative...involved in lots of local Fort Wayne important things...

And so having Beth as my friend should have seemed strange and out of place. But it wasn't. I can't explain it. She was like another world to me, but one that accepted and embraced me for who I was.

Beth and I did have lots of things in common.

First, we were competitive. Some of that had to do with physical co-location (we both had the same teachers K-4). But most of it had to do with me, wanting to be like Beth. She was smart, and every chance I got, I would go head to head with her in academic situations. That ranged from seeing who could get the higher grades on the spelling tests to seeing who could progress quicker through our reading books (i.e. Rainbows, Fiesta, Rewards, Panorama, Kaleidoscope, etc...)

Second, we were both Girl Scouts. We started out as Brownies and then we 'bridged' over to Juniors. Beth's mom, who was one of our leaders, was there the entire way - teaching us the Girl Scout Promise and helping us earn our badges (yes, I need an entire series - just on Girl Scouts!).

Third, we were both labeled as boy crazy. While I was a bit more forthcoming with who I had a crush on (Tom Stinson, Lewis Mastin), Beth was a bit more cautious about revealing who she liked since most of them seemed to live close to her.

Fourth, we were both fans (and active players of) tetherball, kickball, and four square. I could always count on her to play any of these at recess. Sometimes though (at recess), we would just hang together and talk about 'stuff'. Stuff could be - toys, dolls, boys, other girls, teachers, homework - basically nothing was off limits.

Beth and I were thicker than thieves for five years. In those five years - although I've said that we were very different from each other - we both ended up experiencing a lot of the same challenges (and heartbreaks).

Third Grade - Miss McDougall - Indian Village

Time for another class photo!

If you click on the photo, you'll be taken to where it's hosted (on Flickr) and the image is MUCH larger and easier to see.

So here are the usual (and usual) suspects. If you go back and look at my first and fourth grade photos - you'll see a lot of the same kids (i.e. usual suspects). Mind you, this is all from memory (or lack thereof). If I've mislabeled someone - I expect to be told!!! And for gosh sakes if you know the last names, let me know. I seemed to be having major issues with the names from the third grade.

Row 1: Errol Stech, ?
Row 2: Dean ?, Karen Brezette, Doug White, Billy ?, ?
Row 3: Kelly Miller, Eddie Hyde, Eric Busenberik, Zetta ?, Joyce Lloyd, Eugene ? (my cubbie hottie from Kindergarden!!!)
Row 4: Melanie Davis, Danny Gould, Marla Magditch, Steve Saylor, Adam ?, Glen McCourt
Row 5: Tom Stinson, ?, Chrissy Boner, Lori Schmidt,?
Row 6: Kristina Frazier, ?, Stuart Williams, Ralph Barva
Row 7: Beth Fruechtenicht, ?

P.S. And speaking of class photos - I have ZIP ZERO from my second grade. In 1974-75, Mrs. Judith Edwards taught a split 2nd-3rd grade class. If you know of anyone that has this class photo, please let me know. I was out sick that day (I think I had the measles or chicken pox).

"No amount of thought can ever reveal what comes unexpectedly..."

After we walked out of the library, we turned right, making our way down to my old Kindergarten classroom.

The last time I had seen this beautiful room was - gosh - at least 20 years ago.

Me: I have so many fond memories of my Kindergarten teacher Miss Crouse.

Mrs. Ross: My daughter had her too, but after she had married...

Me: I remember that - then she became Mrs. Ludwig.

Mrs. Ross: Yes, that's right.

Me: I loved my Kindergarden room. It was so well-designed. Big. Airy. Homey. I loved the fireplace/mantle area. At least I think that's what it was. I know it had a lot of brick and Miss Crouse used to sit there with Mr. Peabody. Did you know about Mr. Peabody?

Mrs. Ross: The fireplace area - wow - yes. That was a long time ago. I'm not sure who Mr. Peabody was.

Me: Oh. He was the hand puppet that Miss Crouse used to tell us stories.

As soon as I finished that last sentence - I went to catch my breath and instead - I gasped.

OHMYGOSH! MY KINDERGARTEN ROOM IS GONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

This is the area where it used to be. Now, it was an entrance for the food service personnel.

Me: What?! Where's Room 1? Where's my Kindergarten class at???!!!!

Mrs. Ross: Well, it's not there anymore.

Me: I can see that. Wondering if I was going to hyperventilate...

Before she could go on, a teacher (who was well on her way to giving birth anyday), approached us.

Pregnant Teacher: You remember the Kindergarten class?

Me: Yes! You too? Side note: Who would ever think that I would be so emotional over my Kindergarten class.

Pregnant Teacher: I remember it. The door was over here (she pointed to a specific area). It all went away when we remodeled the building and added on the wing.

Me: Oh. (My mouth was turned upside down in a frown - fer real).

Mrs. Ross: Remember how you used to eat your lunch in the gym?

Me: Oh yeah. We used to have to unload those ungodly tables and then fold them back up again. Ugh.

Mrs. Ross: Now, we have a cafeteria and this area backs up to it.

Me: Okay. (breathing. thinking.) So that place behind the library - the new area established in memory of that little boy...that's where my Kindergarten playground was, wasn't it?

Mrs. Ross: Why yes!

Me: Oh man! I remember the sliding doors in the classroom which led out to that playground. I can't believe it's gone - it's all gone.

As we walked away from the place that used to be, I continued telling her about what I remembered about Room 1.

Me: Miss Crouse assigned us all to a group and each group had their own table. I was at table number 6 (the last one of the bunch). In the middle of the table was a center piece with a white number six pushed into a green styrofoam-like mound, with six bumble bees sticking out, all around. Like they were flying. And there were cubbies. Wooden cubbies where we would store our gym shoes. They were stacked, two on top of each other, like a file cabinet. My cubbie mate was Eugene. I was so in love with Eugene (sigh).

I paused. Boy, I was a raving lunatic.

Me: I'm sorry to just be rambling. That filter I usually have in place - you know the one - where there's at least a six second delay between what I'm thinking and what my mouth says? Yeah...it's just not there today. It's the smell of this school. It has this affect of waking up every single memory I ever had of the place.

She smiled.

Mrs. Ross: Oh, I don't mind. It's nice to hear that you have such fond memories of this place. I've worked here for thirty some years and it means a lot to me too.

I smiled. That Mrs. Ross. She was like so many of the wonderful teachers that I had at Indian Village. sigh.

The tour wasn't over. Oh no. We continued down the hall. We were on our way to Miss McDougall's room.

How Tetherball Changed My Life

Tetherball
Originally uploaded by kristinafh

I bow before you oh tetherball inventor!

Who would have known that a ball (which seemed to be a cross between soccer and kick), attached to the rope of death, secured to a metal pole from hell....would have provided two little girls (and their friends) hours and days and years worth of fun?

I'm getting ahead myself. Let's start at...the beginning.

In the beginning, there was Indian Village Elementary School and four playmates - Beth Fruechtenicht, Melanie Davis, Erika Couch, and ME. When we were allowed on to the "big kids" playground, a whole new world was opened up to us.

That world included black asphalt (which doubled for a kick-ball court), a four-square court, and best of all - a tetherball court.

The tetherball court at Indian Village looked kind of like the picture I have attached. P.S. I couldn't find any "decent" photos of tetherball courts - at least those that were applicable to me and my childhood, so that's how I ended up with this picture. So if you have any decent ones - let me know and I'll add them here.

The difference was that the rope had a chain at the very top and the court itself was encircled by a white paint line. But just one. Not multiple. That circle was important - step outside of it when you were making your KILLER move and buddy - you committed an unspeakable act!

The kids in our class used to queue up around the court (at recess) to wait their turn in line to beat whoever was the reigning champion at the time. Beth and I were pretty darned good. Erika was too. On the boys side, Brian Rice and Tom Stinson (my second big crush of grade school), could hold their own. The girls though - we always seemed to kick their butts.

Here's something important to know. Standing in line was never boring. Oh no. This was the time that we would get caught up on "things". For instance? Beth would tell us about what happened the night before on Little House on the Prarie. My dad was into watching things like Sanford and Son so it was crucial for me to get these kinds of updates or else I would be behind the "girl" curve.

This was also the time that we would guess who liked who. Most of this information was based upon who sat with who on the bus.

Side note: NEVER underestimate the important of bus rides. You learn LOTS.

SO - tetherball at school was fun but it was more fun when the sport made it to my own backyard.

For a birthday or Christmas or you know - some gift giving holiday, my sister and I received our own tetherball contraption. It looked like the one in this picture (all rope, ball, and metal), but of course, it was in our backyard and there was NO cement involved.

I don't remember who actually put it in for us (my mom or my dad), but I do know that my sister and I were plenty obsessed with how we were going to be able to ensure "fairness" with any play that would occur.

First thing up, we needed to create our own "white paint circle" but without the white paint.

After playing a couple of tetherball games, I figured out how we could get ourselves a decent, looking circle going on.

If we took the hose, and turned it on, the water made it much easier to loosen the grass.

And when you added bare feet to the equation, along with lots of willing friends who thought playing tetherball in a slip-n-slide environment was really neat, well - our homemade court came just that much faster.

Side note: I wasn’t even grossed out by the worms that got between my toes. But see my sister and I used to have to pull weeds a lot in our garden so worms were like an annoying distraction to us.

Okay - so when the neighborhood kids found out that we had a tetherball, and somehow, there was a water hose involved, suddenly, half of them were in our backyard - all volunteering to "help" the cause.

Joe and Phil Beckstedt, Tricia Manter, Colleen Wooden, Denita Davis, Jackie Boice, Mark and Kevin Grimes. And then - my little sister's love-sick boyfriend (she was seven, he was seven) - Kenny Stech.

That Saturday was quite an eventful day. Not only did we solve our issue, but it was the event of my first kiss.

Well kiss, in the way of peck-on-the-lip(s).

After kicking his butt in tetherball, Philip Beckstedt grabbed my hand and took me around the corner to the back of our one car garage. That's where he planted one on me.

I thought he was WAY cute - he had that killer smile and great hands (yes, even when he was ten years old - loved his hands).

Eight years old. My first kiss from Philip Beckstedt. But not my last. More coming on that much later...

So tetherball - not just a sport. But a faciliator of creativity and other sports.

Ahem.

PART 1 - Indian Village Elementary School - 4th Grade

Alrighty. It's time for another class picture. Feast your eyes on a group of pre-hormonal Hoosier kiddies. I'll tell you a little bit more about fourth grade - and in particular - the people who were a part of this class...tomorrow.



Row 1: Tony Lude, Tom Stinson

Row 2: Cathy Caldwell, Errol Stech, Janice Smith, Brian Rice, Skip Shock

Row 3: Tom Elston, Kelly Miller, Melanie Davis, Ralph Barva, Shonee Bobilya, Lori Schmidt

Row 4: Glen McCormick, David White (?), Joyce Lloyd, Billy ? , Mike Sharp

Row 5: Tim Bush, Kelli Biddle, Brian Blazer, Shelly Vasquez, Beth Fruechtenicht

Row 6: Rodney Rider, Kristina Frazier, Danny Gould, Lewis Mastin

Row 7: Kim Spore, Robert Stone, Belinda Flotow

First Grade - Indian Village Elementary School

Say hello to my first grade class from Indian Village Elementary School. The year (according to the picture) is 1973 and Mrs. Marci Lawson is the inspirational teacher - keeping us all in check.

We were located in Room 19 (yes I know - scary that I remember this).

Our desks were simple, in a complicated way. They weren't the fancy ones that opened up on top. Oh no! They were the kind that opened up to your waist area.

Many things could get lost (and subsequently - GROW) in this area. Emptying these types of desks out at the end of the year was always an anxiety-filled moment because one never knew what people like Brian Blazer and Ralph Barva would pull out of the nooks and cranies of these wooden hothouses.

ANYWAY

If you attended Fort Wayne Community Schools (the elementary ones) in the early to mid 70's, I bet your class pictures looked just like this.

Every year, the photographer would come into our classroom and he would bellow out instructions to our teacher that went something like this.

Okay. Move dem desks to the middle. We gotta make this look like a real classroom

What he meant was that the lens was only so wide and therefore - if the desks were required to be in the picture (by the way - I'm still trying to figure out who made this rule) - then - in order to get everyone in, we had to move all of the people and desks into a small area, sit behind them, and smile for maybe 3-4 shots.

In other words, it took much more time to move the desks around then to actually take the frickin' picture.

The boys really liked to scrape the desk chairs as hard as they could across the concrete (but hey - it looks "tiled" - floor).

I have a ton of great memories from first grade. My first grade experience was extremely profound and I can't even begin to tell you how lucky I was. I think I was just in the right place, at the right time.

Anyway - there will be a lot more to write on this subject of first grade. But for now, let's get scary for a moment. I remember just about everybody's name.

So here it goes. And if I'm missing someone, or if I have spelled their name wrong - please let me know. By all means, if you know where any of these folks are today - let us know!

(Left to Right)

Row 1: Rusty Cramer, David Nelson, Melanie Davis, Kristina Frazier-Henry

Row 2: Skip Shock, Rita ?, Jody Ellis, Bruce ?, Chrissy Boner, Brian Rice, Kathleen Caldwell

Row 3: Ralph Barva, Wendy Shipley, Tracy Nimbles, Betsy Barrett, Kelly Miller, Billy ?, ?

Row 4: Eric Busenbaric, Brian Blazer, Kelly Biddle, Lisa Smith, Tom Stinson, ?

Row 5: Beth Fruechtenicht, Karen Brunette, Stuart Williams, Marla Magditch, Chris Starn, Mike Sharp

Row 6: Tom Malott, Brian Butcher, Janice Smith, Kim Spore