The Best Birthday Ever

Birthday Party - Seven Years Old
Originally uploaded by kristinafh

As a parent, you always hope that your child is filled with great memories of their childhood. I'm sure that my mom, who became a parent at the ripe old age of 17 years and 3 months, had that in mind when she threw me a birthday party in our dinky, 800 square foot home on Cedar Crest Circle.

To the right is the only picture I have of that day. My three best friends from first grade were there (counter clockwise) Ericka Couch, Lisa Smith, and Beth Fruechtenicht. There's a board game sitting in front of us...but I couldn't tell you what it was and without this picture, I wouldn't even have remembered that I had The Flintstones for birthday hats and blowers. I couldn't tell you what was on my cake - if I had one number candle or seven.

What I do remember - as though it was yesterday - is that I was a very happy girl. I don't know if you can see that from my face, but gosh, I was happy.

And why was I happy? Two specific reasons - the guests and the best birthday present that I've ever received in my entire life.

The guests were my three best friends from Indian Village Elementary school and also, members of my family (aunts, uncles, cousins + my mom's cousins and their kids). All of us, squeezed together in that small amount of space sounds claustrophobic, doesn't it?! At the time, it didn't seem anything but fun. I'm sure that my mom, though, was frantic and worried because later on (much later on as an adult), she told me that she ran out of cake and food because so many people showed up that she wasn't expecting.

I probably received a fair number of birthday gifts that year but you know what - that's a blur to me. The only gift that really mattered is what my parents got me.

For the big event, I was shuttled out on to the front porch area (this area wasn't a "porch" per se as much as it was an enclosed part of our house - like a mudroom - with no heat). I was instructed to face the outdoor window and no peeking!!! That window had a view to my neighbors houses across the street - the Wooden's and the Boice's.

I remember the crowd of people who were all standing behind me, waiting for the revelation of the big moment. And then my mom said, You can turn around now.

My smile was the biggest smile you can ever imagine and I squealed with delight. It was everything I ever wanted - a big girl bike. It was a lime green bike...equipped with a white flowered basket, multi-colored plastic streamers hanging out of the handle bars, and a banana seat.

That bike stayed with me for most of my childhood. If it would have had an odometer on it, it would have had thousands of miles racked up on it because as a kid living on Cedar Crest Circle - that's what we did. We rode our bikes. We didn't have to have a destination...we just rode them. Sometimes we rode them by ourselves (in a circle - Cedar Crest, Pinecrest, Cedar Crest) and sometimes we rode in a pack....taking the same route, perhaps stopping at Scott''s Court to play a game of kickball, or sneaking off to play in the forbidden ditch (catching tadpoles), or making our way up Sandhill to play in the area that would later take the life of our friend Delores.

There was a third reason why this was the best birthday ever. It was the last birthday I remember where I wasn't conscious of my father's drinking issues. At my party, I didn't remember that he wasn't there until just before the unveiling of my bike. I didn't remember that he was drunk off his ass and he brought people to my party that I didn't even know.

And why didn't I remember these things? Because my mom made sure that I was distracted so as not to notice. She wanted my birthday to be the kind of birthday that all little girls deserve to have....one filled with lots of happy memories. It worked.

Mommy, it was the best birthday ever and as long as I live, I will never forget how special I felt that day.

Beth...the Beginning

Birthday Party - Seven Years Old
Originally uploaded by kristinafh

As I've stated previously, I don't have many photos from my childhood because most went up in flames when our house was struck by lightning (and subsequently, burnt to the ground). I mention this specifically, for this particular post, because it pains me not to have any other picture of me and Beth together. This is the one - one snapped at my seventh birthday party.

Pictured (from left): Me, Ericka Couch, Lisa Smith, Beth Fruechtenicht

But back to the beginning...

I don't remember the exact moment that I met Beth. This feels strange to me because my memory during this time is pretty vivid and detailed. Our first encounter though, had to be in Kindergarten - Miss Crouse's pm class at Indian Village Elementary School.

Beth was everything I was not - blond, perfectly proportioned, well-off, and she had the ideal parents. Her mom Sharon - I'm not sure what she did (I assumed she did something for a living) - was possibly, the nicest woman I have ever met in my entire life time. Her dad Tom - was a very important man. A state representative...involved in lots of local Fort Wayne important things...

And so having Beth as my friend should have seemed strange and out of place. But it wasn't. I can't explain it. She was like another world to me, but one that accepted and embraced me for who I was.

Beth and I did have lots of things in common.

First, we were competitive. Some of that had to do with physical co-location (we both had the same teachers K-4). But most of it had to do with me, wanting to be like Beth. She was smart, and every chance I got, I would go head to head with her in academic situations. That ranged from seeing who could get the higher grades on the spelling tests to seeing who could progress quicker through our reading books (i.e. Rainbows, Fiesta, Rewards, Panorama, Kaleidoscope, etc...)

Second, we were both Girl Scouts. We started out as Brownies and then we 'bridged' over to Juniors. Beth's mom, who was one of our leaders, was there the entire way - teaching us the Girl Scout Promise and helping us earn our badges (yes, I need an entire series - just on Girl Scouts!).

Third, we were both labeled as boy crazy. While I was a bit more forthcoming with who I had a crush on (Tom Stinson, Lewis Mastin), Beth was a bit more cautious about revealing who she liked since most of them seemed to live close to her.

Fourth, we were both fans (and active players of) tetherball, kickball, and four square. I could always count on her to play any of these at recess. Sometimes though (at recess), we would just hang together and talk about 'stuff'. Stuff could be - toys, dolls, boys, other girls, teachers, homework - basically nothing was off limits.

Beth and I were thicker than thieves for five years. In those five years - although I've said that we were very different from each other - we both ended up experiencing a lot of the same challenges (and heartbreaks).

First Grade - Indian Village Elementary School

Say hello to my first grade class from Indian Village Elementary School. The year (according to the picture) is 1973 and Mrs. Marci Lawson is the inspirational teacher - keeping us all in check.

We were located in Room 19 (yes I know - scary that I remember this).

Our desks were simple, in a complicated way. They weren't the fancy ones that opened up on top. Oh no! They were the kind that opened up to your waist area.

Many things could get lost (and subsequently - GROW) in this area. Emptying these types of desks out at the end of the year was always an anxiety-filled moment because one never knew what people like Brian Blazer and Ralph Barva would pull out of the nooks and cranies of these wooden hothouses.

ANYWAY

If you attended Fort Wayne Community Schools (the elementary ones) in the early to mid 70's, I bet your class pictures looked just like this.

Every year, the photographer would come into our classroom and he would bellow out instructions to our teacher that went something like this.

Okay. Move dem desks to the middle. We gotta make this look like a real classroom

What he meant was that the lens was only so wide and therefore - if the desks were required to be in the picture (by the way - I'm still trying to figure out who made this rule) - then - in order to get everyone in, we had to move all of the people and desks into a small area, sit behind them, and smile for maybe 3-4 shots.

In other words, it took much more time to move the desks around then to actually take the frickin' picture.

The boys really liked to scrape the desk chairs as hard as they could across the concrete (but hey - it looks "tiled" - floor).

I have a ton of great memories from first grade. My first grade experience was extremely profound and I can't even begin to tell you how lucky I was. I think I was just in the right place, at the right time.

Anyway - there will be a lot more to write on this subject of first grade. But for now, let's get scary for a moment. I remember just about everybody's name.

So here it goes. And if I'm missing someone, or if I have spelled their name wrong - please let me know. By all means, if you know where any of these folks are today - let us know!

(Left to Right)

Row 1: Rusty Cramer, David Nelson, Melanie Davis, Kristina Frazier-Henry

Row 2: Skip Shock, Rita ?, Jody Ellis, Bruce ?, Chrissy Boner, Brian Rice, Kathleen Caldwell

Row 3: Ralph Barva, Wendy Shipley, Tracy Nimbles, Betsy Barrett, Kelly Miller, Billy ?, ?

Row 4: Eric Busenbaric, Brian Blazer, Kelly Biddle, Lisa Smith, Tom Stinson, ?

Row 5: Beth Fruechtenicht, Karen Brunette, Stuart Williams, Marla Magditch, Chris Starn, Mike Sharp

Row 6: Tom Malott, Brian Butcher, Janice Smith, Kim Spore